Last June, I blogged about the art of losing a baby. It was our first time experiencing a miscarriage so close to the ‘safe zone’ (start of the second trimester). We’re just one of many upon many who have stared at the non-beating heart of their baby during an ultrasound – it just happened to be our turn last June. When a pregnancy is lost, the hopes, dreams, and imagined scenarios for that child abruptly stop. For some, it may seem silly to love something that grew no bigger than a fig. But for others, they completely understand.
I didn’t know what a rainbow baby was prior to my pregnancy with Violet. But I soon embraced the concept. After all, a rainbow baby is one following a miscarriage because a rainbow often brightens the sky after a storm. Violet is our rainbow baby – the brightest and most beautiful rainbow that could have ever entered our lives. And while it wasn’t the reason we named her Violet, it seems only fitting that her namesake is a color found in a rainbow.
On the main floor on our house, a room that we call the office/playroom sits just a step above the living room. With great natural light, it is a bit of an awkward space. The previous tenants used the room as an office (complete with one of the largest wooden desks I’ve ever seen) but because the basement is just too damn cold in the winter, we knew we had to use the space as a playroom too. Yay for dual purpose rooms!
As you can see, the room is in desperate need of more organization. While I like to think that our little guy isn’t drowning in toys, these photos really paint a different picture…perhaps another purge is necessary. And now that we have thrown another child into the mix, I really need to figure out some solutions for this space that are both functional and pretty/handsome/insert adjective here.
Most importantly, I don’t want to spend a ton of money doing so. After all, we’re not going to live here forever (heck, we really don’t know how long we’re going to be living here period…the joys of the military!). I have a few of ideas – I’m sure some will work out wonderfully while others will die a fiery death. So over the next month or so, I will revisit this room and showcase some of the changes I’ve made. I hope. At least that is the plan. I am still trying to get a handle on this whole having two children deal so I can’t make any promises. First stop? I am thinking IKEA…
Clay went back to work this morning so today marks the official beginning of our new normal. While I loved (loved!) having Clay home, I am excited to get into a routine and find my groove as a stay-at-home mom to two kids. I plan on returning to work within the next couple of years (I do miss my professional-self very much) so I hope to savor this time at home and not dream about the grass being greener on the other side. And because Violet is still very much in the sleepy newborn stage so I am using this time to set up systems that will hopefully make my days run smoother than a cat on the prowl. After all, I’m trying my hardest not to look like a hot mess this time around.
Speaking of which – it is amazing how much more relaxed I am about life with a newborn again. I was an emotional wreck during the first couple of months of Weston’s life. We endured breastfeeding struggles, dealt with Clay deploying, and I allowed my insecurities to overwhelm me at times. With Violet, I have confidence, a co-parent, and a fantastic helper in the form of an almost four-year-old. The fact that I can have a glass of wine with my husband at the end of a long day is enough to put the extra pep in my step and get the “I can do this!” attitude pumping through my veins.
This past weekend, my dad, sister, brother-in-law, and nephew came to visit. My mom was still in town so my dad flew up to see Violet and to accompany my mom with the drive back down to Georgia. My dad recently celebrated his 55th birthday and my sister turned 29 at the end of June so we threw a little party to celebrate the birthdays and the arrival of Violet. Any excuse for good beer and cake, right?
And finally, I am itching to get back into a workout routine. I have no plans to do anything too soon (I made the mistake of Googling ‘uterine prolapse’ one night…don’t do it!) but I am anxious to get back to my pre-baby weight and start a new training regiment. I am considering documenting my weight-loss on the blog but the jury is still out whether it will be helpful for others or just annoying to read. I am always inspired by the fitness achievements of others but still unsure whether I want to ‘put it all out there’ so to speak. We’ll see!