Days When I Feel Like An Impostor

On the very rare occasion, someone will comment, “I don’t know how you do it” in regards to Clay being in the Army. Currently, he is in a unit that is not part of a deployment rotation so I tend to get a bit squirmy when I hear those words. Aside from the occasional TDY and a demanding job with long hours (and let’s be honest, these are certainly not unique to the military), this assignment has been fairly low-key because we don’t have a long deployment looming. I can’t help but feel like an impostor of sorts – yes, I have a husband in the military but right now, it’s not that hard.

IMG_1711

The rational part of me realizes that we have experienced 28 months of deployments and too many TDYs to count over the years and will experience more in the future. Being associated with the Army during a two-front ground war wasn’t always a rose garden. During our first four years of marriage, we were probably physically together for about 18 months (non-consecutive), give or take. And our situation was hardly unique. But things have slowed down some since the height of the wars. Don’t get me wrong – I am not complaining. But as I mentioned, sometimes I feel like I am in the wrong class on the first day of school or part of a club of which I don’t meet membership requirements. It’s silly, I know. I am sure there are more hardships ahead of us and I just need to enjoy this relatively calm time and relish our time together because who knows what the Army will throw our way next.

ps – I joined Twitter. Again.

Advertisements

3 thoughts on “Days When I Feel Like An Impostor

  1. I feel like you a lot of the the times. My husband was active Airforce, then active Army, and now he is in the National Guard. I am a military wife but I was never with him when he was in the active Airforce and when I met him he had just gotten back from his deployment and was finishing up his time in the active Army – in fact he probably would have stayed active but he came home to be with me (I have a son from a previous marriage so I am unable to move at this time). He is in the Guard for the long haul now and I am sure there will be tough times ahead but like you – I feel like I am part of a club of which I don’t meet membership requirements. You are not alone!

  2. I feel that way too sometimes, most recently when I watched Lone Survivor. My husband is in the air wing, even though he has deployed to Afghanistan, his job isn’t really dangerous. Sometimes I feel like people have this idea of what the military does on deployment, and my husband doesn’t match that, therefore my experience as a military spouse during deployment doesn’t match either :/

Do you have something to say?

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s